“You’ve said on your profile that you’re autistic?” That’s one question one I got asked when I started online dating. And before you ask; yes, I did write on my profile that I have Autism – and I don’t regret it.
When I started online dating, I decided to be open and honest about myself because I wanted to make new friends, as well as finding a possible future lover.
According to Dating Sites Reviews. com, 91 million people worldwide use dating apps and 7 in 10 of these users are between 16 and 34 years old. So when you think of how many users go online, how many of them tell the truth? You don’t know. However, you’ll know if they’re interested in you and message you privately. That’s what happened with me, involving a couple of users – half of them stopped contacting, weeks after we exchanged; the rest are still in conversation with me.
And, I don’t feel bad about myself because there’ll be plenty fish in the sea. When I got in and lost contact with my first guy, I did feel disappointed and confused. In time, I began to realise that not contacting me back is their loss; they never confessed that they didn’t want to contact me anyone, but I guess that’s boy talk for, “I’m done with you”. However, they may contact again, but I cannot guarantee that it’ll happen.
Before that stage happened, everything was building up; we got to know each other like what we study, work and lives. Most of their lives were extremely interesting; each person reminded me of an interesting character in a William Shakespeare play, a Jane Austin novel or one of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock series. I couldn’t believe that there were so many fascinating lives in the world. And this, the concept of online dating, has taught me something – it’s fun (in the words of my closet friends,”it’s like exploring a sweet shop”) and educational. There, you can learn, through others, about different cultures that are happening all over the world and what happens in their lives, like the subjects they study at University for example.
But when it came to the Autistic part, I knew I had to speak the truth. I had many questions from them – “what’s it’s like being Autistic” and “how does it affect you?” When I was younger, I felt uncomfortable talking about it but since I became one of the 91 million online dating users, my confidence grew and grew. And what I replied to them was the truth. Not the truth that I just gabble on and on, without stopping to look. But the truth that I take to write and re-write, taken straight from my heart. And with that, I leave them to judge their opinion. So far, I’ve had positive, confused and some, out of tone responses. None of them have been negative (thank goodness). However, I don’t know what I’m going to receive next time. It may be good; it may not. As long as I’m comfortable speaking about Autism, that’s all it matters to me.
Can online dating improve your life? Possibly. Can it teach you something? Absolutely! That’s why I highly recommend it. Time maybe changing, but in a way that you may not expect it to be.
If you are considering online dating, then don’t be afraid to start today; it could change your life. Whither you are Autistic or not, it could be an excellent way to start new turns in your relationships and friendships. It certainly did for me. However, it may take a while before you might find the right people – possibly years (which is similar to finding love, off the screen). But don’t lose hope; love can happen to everyone – we all deserve it. But remember when you sign up and thinking of what information to write on your profile – Just be Yourself! Don’t get carried away or lie your way around situations; that’s not the answer to make new friends or a future love.
Also, don’t be afraid to share your hobbies and your daily life. You may meet fantastic people, who may share the same activities as you! You could be very lucky this way, as sharing them can make a relationship and/or friendships stronger.
As for me, I’ll continue to seek new friendships and possible lovers, until I reach success – it may take a while, but I’m not giving up that easily. 😉