Waiting For A Rainbow – 31st December 2014

Bucket List – Things To Do Before I Turn 21

Glastonbury

  1. Visit Versailles ^
  2. Take a Photography Course
  3. Learn to Play the Guitar
  4. Publish Something (!)
  5. Host a Dinner Party – and Invite People (!)
  6. Have a Portrait Painted
  7. Learn a Foreign Language
  8. Be An Extra in a Film/Television Program
  9. Do My Own Laundry (!)
  10. Get a Move On With My Driving (!)
  11. Be a Zoo Keeper For A Day
  12. Be More Charitable
  13. Volunteer To Help
  14. Go Somewhere Unfamiliar
  15. Sing karaoke
  16. Go 24 Hours Without Technology
  17. Watch A Sunset
  18. Be Brave
  19. Create a Dream Home – For When I Move Out (Goodness Knows How Long It’ll Be)
  20. Plan An Awesome 21st Birthday Party (!)

“Don’t give up on your dreams. Just promise me to carry on believing!”

A friend’s farewell promise, June 2014


Wednesday 31st December

Happy New Year’s Eve!

Where has 2014 gone? It seems only yesterday that we were celebrating New Year’s in January. Anyway, here’s what happened in December.

On the first, I decided to put up the Christmas tree. In the morning, Dad opened the loft and brought down the tree, decorations, lights and family crib. I brought them downstairs and into the living room. Dad left me to do the tree. Overall, it took me an hour and a half to put up the tree; I kept misplacing the branches into their incorrect places. Afterwards, Dad and I put up the lights and the decorations. Later in the day, Dad put up more decorations, including candy canes, an old stocking and golden holly tinsel. Also, he hung tinsel around the living room, in the hallway and on the stair banister.

On the seventh, it was my day off. A and I went to London; we went to New Bond Street to shop in Victoria’s Secret but it was closed until midday. So, we decided to browse from New Bond Street to Regent Street. Then, we stopped at Starbucks for refreshments before returning to the shop. While we were shopping in Victoria’s Secret, I had a Miranda moment.

Miranda is one of my favourite British sitcoms of all time; I admire Miranda Hart’s work and her show.

Anyway, A and I were stuck between a few people and we had to squeeze past them.

Next, I had my back to the people when I heard a deep voice behind me; “I’m sorry, sir”.

I paused and turned around to look at the man. We stared at each other, with frozen puzzled faces.

Did he call me, “sir”? I thought.

At the time, I had my hair cut short like Maggie Gyllenhaal. Unfortunately, I didn’t realise that it made look like a boy (even from behind).

My next thought was about the man; I guess he felt embarrassed.

After shopping, A and I we went out to Nando’s for lunch and in the early evening, we went to the Imperial War Museum in Lambeth. We spent a few hours there before going home. It was a very interesting day.

On the fifteenth, I went out to the KoKo club in Camden with I, his mum, Ol and S. There was a special concert at the club called Autism Rocks; the event was run by the National Autistic Society. On the stage, there were unsigned acts, playing their own music or singing cover versions by well-known artists. We had so much fun; we looked around the club and danced the night away.

Before Christmas, many cast members brought in sweets for everyone – Harbio’s, Smarties, oranges, Pringle crisps, Mars bars and Maltesers. On my last show, we all wished each other a “Merry Christmas” and a “Happy Hanukkah” because one of my friends was celebrating Hanukkah.

On Christmas Eve, a few visitors came round, dropping off cards and presents. In the evening, Mum, Dad and I had a fish and chip supper. However, Mum and I had scrambled eggs instead of the fish.

Christmas Day was very busy. In the morning, Mum, Dad and I opened our presents. Then, I started cooking my first Christmas lunch; Dad gave me a helping hand. It took me four hours to prepare. I cooked Turkey, Sausages, roast potatoes, carrots, parsnips and Brussel sprouts. The three of us tucked in and enjoyed our meal. In the evening, my brother, my sister-in-law, her mother, H and G came round for tea. After tea, the seven of us played games. We played a trivia card game and Don’t Panic. We had really good fun.

On Boxing Day, A, J, my Auntie and Uncle came round for tea. Before tea, the boys were watching football, Mum and my Auntie were cooking and A and I watched Miranda Hart’s My, What I Call Live Show (which was one of my Christmas presents). We had a curry for tea; it was delicious. Afterwards, we had pudding and played board games; we played Articulate and 20 Questions.

I’m afraid to say that I regret eating a lot of food that day because I felt sick by the time I went to bed.

Now as it is New Year’s Eve, it is time to write resolutions for the New Year. I always write resolutions; they are like targets for me. However, I don’t stick to them; this year, it’s going to be different. I’ve been an early bird this year because I wrote my resolutions before Christmas.

So, here are my resolutions:

New Year’s Resolutions 2015

–              Stop nicking/asking people for food

–              Try and stay on top of everything, i.e. homework

–              Be more thoughtful and be nice to people

–              Don’t push anyone in team work projects

–              Exercise more

–              Learn a new language

–              Cut off the chips to once a month

–              Do more cooking

–              Do more clothes washing & ironing

–              Sing karaoke

–              Buy & record a food diary of what I have eaten during the day

–              Make 2015 the best one yet! 😉

Total:  12 Resolutions

I’ve been doubting myself again. It is something that has been haunting, upsetting and causing me a sleepless night.

I won’t explain why because I don’t want to case any upset over my friends.

I felt never so bad; my heart was aching so badly. I jumped over the edge all because I didn’t know what was really going on. I was stupid to not even think. I am a bad luck magnet.

I have lost my faith in finding true love.

What does the word “love” mean anyway if people misuse it and its feeling? It seems to me that there aren’t many people who care. In the past, I wanted to find and feel loved; I didn’t want to give up finding Mr Right.

But, I’m afraid. I am afraid of being hurt in a relationship.

Therefore, I have come to a conclusion; I’ve decided to never fall in love. It is a painful decision to make but it is my choice. Anyway, who would want to date or marry an Autistic performing arts student who is an idiot when it comes to love and relationships; I can never trust myself falling in love. Nobody is prefect.

My love life exists in my head but it can never exist in real life. No one ever treats me with personal respect or has ever said, “I love you” to me, like they meant it.

However, if there is anyone in this world who is willing to love someone for their inner beauty rather their out, please be honest with me. That’s all I want in my life right now; no more lies or flirtation. Just pure honesty.

I am never an inspiration and I will never will be.

Waiting For A Rainbow – 1st December 2014

Bucket List – Things To Do Before I Turn 21

Glastonbury

  1. Visit Versailles ^
  2. Take a Photography Course
  3. Learn to Play the Guitar
  4. Publish Something (!)
  5. Host a Dinner Party – and Invite People (!)
  6. Have a Portrait Painted
  7. Learn a Foreign Language
  8. Be An Extra in a Film/Television Program
  9. Do My Own Laundry (!)
  10. Get a Move On With My Driving (!)
  11. Be a Zoo Keeper For A Day
  12. Be More Charitable
  13. Volunteer To Help
  14. Go Somewhere Unfamiliar
  15. Sing karaoke
  16. Go 24 Hours Without Technology
  17. Watch A Sunset
  18. Be Brave
  19. Create a Dream Home – For When I Move Out (Goodness Knows How Long It’ll Be)
  20. Plan An Awesome 21st Birthday Party (!)

“Even if we grow up, we can still keep on dreaming”.

November 2014


Monday 1st December

Well, here we are – we are now towards the end of 2014. Wow. Where does the time go by?

When I last wrote, I recall that A would take me to see a fireworks display. She did; we went to the display in near where we live. She picked up as the sun was setting. We had a Nando’s dinner before walking to the park; we stood on top of a hill and soon, we were joined by a hundred people. A and I were freezing from head to toe. Then, the display had begun. It was the most specular display I had ever seen; the fireworks were lit and set off in the sky. There were big bangs, Catherine wheels and our personal favourites – fireworks that made smiley faces. When the display finished with a big bang, the crowds clapped and cheered.

Next morning, A and I travelled to London. In the morning, we went to the Natural History Museum and in the afternoon, we went shopping in Oxford Street. We browsed through Selfridges; the shop already had their Christmas decorations up and on their Emporium floor, they had Christmas Music playing in the background. I assumed that is the sign that Christmas has arrived early again.

At Drama school, I finished lessons on the seventh of November. After that day, we were getting ready for the Christmas show.

On Remembrance Sunday, Mum and I went up to Earl’s Court with my aunt and A to go to the Discover Dogs show. We had a good time – A and I spent most of our time together; we saw and stroked all the breeds of dogs and getting licked by them. We also watched dog dancing from the Southern Golden Retriever Society, Mary Rae, and Richard Curtis; a special family friendly show from the Metropolitan Police, agility and pedigree classes. Also, we had the minute silence to remember the soldiers who died in World War One.

During the second week, I had been at the school doing Peter Pan rehearsals and helping out backstage. One day, I was working with G-L during a technical rehearsal. During the run, we were waiting for work and got bored. So, we decided to liven things up; we told jokes, taught sign language to each other (I now know how to sign “Happy Birthday” now) and played “I Spy”. Playing “I Spy” went out of control when we gave up for the answers – we had never laughed so hard. I guess it cheered me up.

On the sixteenth, A and I went to Waddesdon Manor in Buckinghamshire. We went to visit the Christmas lights in the Manor. It’s a tradition we try to do every Christmas. This year’s theme was Christmas stories, myths and rituals. We both had fun; we also bought two sugar mice’s. I never had one before so I was really excited. A had a pink one (strawberry flavoured) and I had a white one (peach flavoured). They were really nice.

Peter Pan is going well. The dress rehearsals were intense because I had to look after and support my group.

I had my first performance on the twenty-eighth. The pirates were amazing; we all sang and gave all we got; we were like Tasmanian devils. However, we also had to be careful. The crowd went wild for our song, children in the audience booed, and hissed in the second act when Captain Hook captured the lost boys and cheered when Peter Pan flew in to rescue them, Wendy, John and Michael. But that’s not the end of it; we have thirteen shows to go. Hopefully, we can do it together; we are a team force and are unstoppable.

Also, I’ve done backstage work as an Assistant Stage Manager and I have been working in the wings. I don’t like hanging around but I like to meet, greet and help everyone; I even get to join in the fun, hearing the show, clapping to save Tinkerbell, boo, and hiss at Captain Hook, and the pirates, cheering at the intervals and the end.

In October, I participated in a Christmas single with the Donate Your Voice Choir, presented by Waitrose.

One night, Mum came home with the shopping and an advert asking for volunteers to participate in the choir, singing to Dolly Parton’s song “Try”. After singing, participants can donate their voice to three charities – Age UK, Great Ormond Street Children’s Hospital and The Trussell Trust.  I sang for nearly two hours; I kept practising until the end.

On the twenty-ninth, I went out to dinner at Pizza Express in Harpenden. I first stopped at I’s house where Mum dropped us at the restaurant. Inside, there was R, P and another friend named N.

We had a fantastic time; we had a nice meal, talked about the Performing Arts Industry, Politics, and made jokes. We were talking a lot and had a few giggles.

After dinner, we went back to I’s house for a few drinks. We walked back in the thick, misty fog.

When we arrived back at the house and had the drinks. I’s parents dropped us home.

I had so much fun and it was wonderful to see P, R and I again. It was also nice to go out for a change.

Christmas is around the corner; I thought about what I want this year. I told my parents that I would like to sign language lessons. However, I have secretly wanted to make children happy, to bless I love, to forgive those who have hurt me, to have world piece and to find true love. I know I haven’t been good and made mistakes, I’m not going to give up. I don’t mind if my wish isn’t fulfilled this year; what I do mind is that my other wishes come true because not many people will have a happy Christmas. My heart goes out to them and I hope all of their dreams come true.

Well, that’s all for now. Have a great Christmas everybody and I’ll write again in the New Year.

Waiting For A Rainbow – 1st November 2014

“Keep on believing, be positive and keep on dreaming. You need to create your own destiny were everyone can see for who you truly are”.

Georgiana’s friends, September 2014


Saturday 1st November

My timetable for Autumn term will finish on the seventh. From the tenth, I will only come in for the Christmas show rehearsals and shows; my timetable will look like this:

Wednesday 12/11

Thursday 13/11

Friday 14/11

Saturday 15/11

09:00
09:15
09:30

Technical

09:45
10:00
10:15
10:30
10:45
11:00

Technical

11:15
11:30
11:45
12:00
12:15
12:30
12:45
13:00
13:15
13:30
13:45
14:00
14:15
14:30
14:45
15:00
15:15
15:30
15:45

Rehearsal

16:00

Home

16:15
16:30
16:45
17:00
17:15
17:30
17:45
18:00
18:15
18:30
18:45
19:00
19:15
19:30
19:45
20:00
20:15
20:30

Home

20:45
21:00

Home

Home

My first term at Drama school so far has been hectic. I’ve been studying a lot, which makes me very tired.

We’ve been working on Inclusion and Exclusion in the world. We also have had dancing, and vocal sessions, and module examinations on Health and Safety and Children’s Protection. We’ve also been working on stereotypes; this term we focused on Fattism, mental health, racism and sexism.

In one stereotype session, the class were the teachers’ performances of stereotypes.

My group focused on appearance. We performed a small scenario of an auction bid; the bid was on blind dates with girls placing their bids on two boys. Then, we did a physical theatre dance on jealously and what people have that others don’t, i.e., boots, jackets, and long hair and bullying. However, what integrated me was a new kind of stereotype, which I never knew it existed – toy stereotypes. After one group performed a physical theatre piece on toy stereotypes, the class discussed on toys.

One girl told a story about how she was jealous of Barbie when the girl watched a film of her, living in a mansion house, having blonde hair, blue eyes and to have a handsome boyfriend and then get married to him like Ken. She said that she wanted to have a life like Barbie. To not have those things make feel left out and bad about herself. What she had said was form of stereotype for girls to make them feel like outcasts. I used to have a lot and played with Barbie dolls and one Action Man doll when I was younger; now I feel bad about having them because of the story.

Lately, I’ve been working voluntary in a children’s theatre workshop. This term, I am working with children, aged five to seven years. It has been energetic but fun. We’ve been learning sign language, doing physical theatre on the story “The Three Little Pigs” and had special workshops on occasions like Halloween. The children had a good time.

Also, I managed to amaze myself. One day before we started our session, I noticed that there were pieces of blank paper and colouring felt tip pens. I started drawing pictures; I decided to draw a rainbow and to write this sentence:

“I am unique and I am special because I am a multi-coloured rainbow”.

When the children came in and started colouring, they were just relaxing and started colouring straight away. But, one of the children looked at my picture and started laughing.

“You are not special”, the child said.

However instead of telling him off, I just smiled. Drawing this picture made me realise that I wasn’t drawing and writing about me; it was for anyone who is trying to reveal their true colours. I always think we are all different because the world would be a boring place to live if we’re the same.

Then, the teachers’ from the workshop asked me to participate as a volunteer for a theatrical day with the Noah’s Ark Children’s Hospice.

This day was on the eleventh. I worked with children and their siblings. This was a great opportunity and this was a special day for the children. The workshop’s main theme was Peter Pan.

It was really fun; throughout the day, the children and volunteers were playing and suggesting ideas for the activities we did before presenting them in front of their parents and careers. We created a Peter Pan Amusement Park, Peter Pan squeals, and organising questions for the parents and careers to answer for a quiz.

We were having so fun and I didn’t want it to end.

In my free time, I made time to see my friends outside Drama school. I’ve also had time to spend with my family.

Last Sunday, A and I went to Woburn Abbey near Ampithill, Bedfordshire. It was a very cold, windy day, properly because the estate was on top of a hill. We looked around the house, the exhibitions in the stables and the gardens. We enjoyed looking around Woburn Abbey; A and I agreed it is beautiful and we would love to come back again soon.

Yesterday, I went to my first adult Halloween party with I and R. The party was organised by the Special Olympics organisation; they were holding the pub at a nearby pub in Hertfordshire.

At dinner, I started to get ready for the party; I got out my dress, my shoes, and my make-up before putting them on. I dressed up as a witch.

Later, Dad drove me to I’s house. I was dressed up as a devil; he had a red devil face mask, white T-Shirt, brown trousers and a skeleton hand bone necklace. He did look terrifying. I’s parents took us up to the pub and we were dropped off inside.

The pub was very small, it was overcrowded and full of strangers like bees in a hive.

Then, R came to greet I and me in his zombie penguin costume. R is into penguins and for the rest of the evening, I decided to nickname him “pingu”.

The three of us had a wonderful time; we had a few drinks and danced the night away. We had a special DJ company who played on classic tunes like “Abracadabra”, “Ghostbusters”, “Thriller”, “Lovestruck” and “Staying Alive”. At first, we were the only ones dancing; then, a few people came to join us. Then, an old friend of mine who I haven’t seen for ages performed a special rap – I never thought he had so much talent. The crowd went wild.

R then gave me a gift; one of his paintings.  His painting was a colourful masterpiece, painted on an original canvas; it had a 3D picture of a hand making the ‘victory’ sign. R then decorated it with fire flames and diamond shapes in the background, around the hand and finger nails. It was the most specular piece that I have even seen. R said it took him six weeks to finish it but it was worth the wait. I absolutely adore it and will treasure it forever and ever.

I and I left the party when Dad and Mum came to pick us up later in the evening. We said our goodbyes to R and took I back to his house.

When I got home, I had developed a massive migraine from standing near the DJ speakers. I took some medicine and went straight to sleep. I never had so much fun on the spookiest night of the year.

Lately, I’ve decided that I wanted to take my dreams further. A few friends at Drama school have inspired me after giving me great advice. They said that I should think positive thoughts, follow my dreams and create my destiny. So, I decided to write a Dream List. All I did was write down things I wish to do now and in the future. This is what I have wished for:

My Dream List

  1. To travel to America, India, Africa, Italy, Spain, Austria, Holland, Australia and New Zealand
  1. To participate in a film, television, theatre or radio program
  1. To have the honour of singing the UK National Anthem
  1. To have a chance of meeting the British Royal family
  1. To have a chance of being a date for a celebrity and raise money for charity
  1. To play Jane Porter from Tarzan – she is one of my favourite literal characters of all time
  1. To publish stories for children
  1. To be a better person
  1. To make and realise an album for charity and sing duets from my favourite singers
  1. To set up a small theatre company of my own
  1. To play a Disney character
  1. To send my old toys and clothes to the poor children in third world countries
  1. Sail on a Disney Cruise
  1. To find and love someone who is kind, caring and who will love for who I am
  1. Travel to the jungle
  1. Ride an elephant
  1. Swim with dolphins
  1. Help animals in a rescue centre
  1. Stay in a Tree House
  1. Try to do more photography
  1. Volunteer aboard
  1. Learn to Hula
  1. Dance in a different country
  1. Go to Walt Disney World Resort in Florida
  1. To receive a surprise from a mysterious visitor – a nice one though, not nasty
  1. To make life-long friends, after University
  1. To make life-long memories with those I admire and love

I’ve got to get ready because A is going to pick me up soon. She’s promised to take me to a fireworks display tonight. She hasn’t told me where it is, so this is a surprise. I’m looking forward to it but I hope it won’t be too cold; I’ve been sneezing all day. I think I’m getting that cold again. Oh well, it won’t stop me from having fun with my lovely cousin.

Waiting For A Rainbow – 1st October 2014

Bucket List – Things To Do Before I Turn 21

 Glastonbury

  1. Visit Versailles ^
  2. Take a Photography Course
  3. Learn to Play the Guitar
  4. Publish Something (!)
  5. Host a Dinner Party – and Invite People (!)
  6. Have a Portrait Painted
  7. Learn a Foreign Language
  8. Be An Extra in a Film/Television Program
  9. Do My Own Laundry (!)
  10. Get a Move On With My Driving (!)
  11. Be a Zoo Keeper For A Day
  12. Be More Charitable
  13. Volunteer To Help
  14. Go Somewhere Unfamiliar
  15. Sing karaoke
  16. Go 24 Hours Without Technology
  17. Watch A Sunset
  18. Be Brave
  19. Create a Dream Home – For When I Move Out (Goodness Knows How Long It’ll Be)
  20. Plan An Awesome 21st Birthday Party (!)

“It’s time to change; that’ll be the best thing for me”.

 September 2014


Wednesday 1st October

Start after I wrote my last entry, I received a message on my Facebook profile page. I went to check it out; I then noticed my name, tagged in a video message from one of my Drama school friends, O. To my surprise, I discovered that he had nominated me for Macmillan Ice Bucket Challenge.

However, I had a feeling O might nominate me because he, a few of my friends and I were talking about the challenge a couple of weeks ago. Since then, I’ve been dreading about it. When the day finally came, I knew I had to accomplish the task. O gave me forty-eight hours.

I did the challenge the following afternoon. When I told Mum and Dad about doing the challenge, Dad wasn’t too keen. He talked me out of this but, I decided to go ahead.

The challenge took place in the back garden. The sooner I get it done, the better, I thought. I was very nervous; I wasn’t looking to have very cold water landing on me. Mum and Dad were in the garden with me. I sat down on one of our blue deck chairs.

“I want to thank O for nominating me for the Ice Bucket Challenge”, I said, facing Mum who was recording the challenge on my iPad. I then said that I was doing the challenge for charity, supporting Macmillan Cancer Trust.

I gave Dad, the signal to pour the bucket of cold water on my head. I closed my eyes; then, I felt the water pouring on top of me. I screamed, really loudly; the water was very cold, so my body wasn’t very keen on the temperature.

“OH MY GOD, THAT’S COLD”, I yelled.

It took me a while to get over the bitter coldness of the water. Once I came to, I said, “Someone get me a towel; quick!”

Instead of waiting, I ran back into the house, picked up my towel in the kitchen.

I was so glad when I finished. Mum and Dad didn’t say anything.

I didn’t do very much during the first week of September, expect spending time with my friends and family. I went to the cinema with A, I went out to dinner at an Indian Restaurant with A, J, their parents, and mine and I went out with T for a pizza in town.

Then on the seventh, I went on a picnic with I, R, and three more friends, Ol, S, P and RT for the afternoon in a local park.

We all had a nice time, talking and socialising with each other – we even played Frisbee. I made friends with P and S and now we keep in contact with each other.

In the evening, A came round to mine and we had our nails done. She suggested that we should paint them like the Hogwarts badges and the Harry Potter’s scar. A said she was inspired after watching tutorial videos on YouTube of professional make-up artists, painting the Hogwarts all four house badges. However, A also said that the videos were complicated. So we decided to make ones of our own. On each finger, we painted a black background, with Harry’s scar in the middle, the Gryffindor, the Hufflepuff badges (with gold and yellow nail paints), the Ravenclaw and the Slytherin badges (with bronze and white paints). A was unsure how it would turn out but we did it. While we were painting the nails, we listened to music on my iPad.

When our nails were dry, we danced and sang along to old school tunes; Superman, Cotton Eye Joe and 5, 6, 7, 8. Nothing beats good dance tunes than old school tunes and we had a blast!

During my first week, my timetable was like this:

Tuesday 9/9

Wednesday 10/9

Thursday 11/9

Friday 12/9

10:00

Induction Project

10:15
10:30
10:45
11:00
11:15
11:30
11:45
12:00
12:15
12:30

12:45

13:00

Induction Project

13:15
13:30
13:45
14:00

Induction Project

14:15
14:30
14:45
15:00
15:15
15:30
15:45

Induction Project

16:00

Home

16:15
16:30

Break

Home

Home

16:45
17:00

Christmas Show Rehearsal

17:15
17:30
17:45
18:00
18:15
18:30

Break

18:45

19:00

Christmas Show Observation 2

19:15
19:30
19:45
20:00
20:15

20:30

Home

Trying to get ready for the first day was hectic. A week before, I was given a very, very late email from my tutors (this contained what will happen and what I need to do whilst on the course). Also, it said on the letter I need to do some research and bring work in by the ninth. The topics I had to research included Inclusion and Mainstream Theatre. It was a lot to take in but in the end, I typed up ten pages of research. I stuck my research on with blue tack (much to Dad’s disapproval) onto several pieces of paper and lamented them. I managed to finish them in the morning before I went to the school. My first day was in the afternoon.

Before we began, I sat down in the cafeteria where I saw my old friends; L, O, E, A, N, Na, Li, J, D, G-L, S and Iz.

There were new people too; there were H, So, another Rai, Da, Mar, F, Kay, Sha and P.

When we were taken into a classroom, my first year tutor brought my year together in a circle; we went around and said our names, what we have done in the summer and/or what theatre productions have they seen. We managed to settle in very well and got off to a great first week.

Also, we started our Christmas show rehearsals. This year’s Christmas show is Peter Pan, which is one of my favourite stories. When I heard that we were doing the show, I said I wanted to be a pirate.

On my first rehearsal, I was called in fifteen minutes before because my teachers wanted to talk to me – I was told that I was given responsibility as a group leader in a small group. This meant I had to look after individuals who need extra help during rehearsals and shows. Then, I was put into my group and I was cast as a pirate! Yes! The people I had in my group were also cast as pirates. However, most of teenagers were very quiet, despite my effort to interact with them, especially while we were learning the finale song. So I decided to find games online for my group during our rehearsals.

Monday 15/9

Thursday 18/9

Friday 19/9

10:00

Induction Project

Induction Project

10:30
11:00
11:30
12:00

Break

12:30

Vocal

13:00

Induction Project

13:30

Lunch

14:00
14:30
15:00

Home

15:30
16:00
16:30
17:00

Home

Christmas Show Rehearsal

17:30
18:00
18:30

Home

We had two workshops; the first one was about masks with the BA students. As well as playing and acting out with the masks in small groups, we also played games like “Grandmother’s Footsteps” and exercises where we transformed into different characters. The second one (also with the BA students) was on cirque gymnastics. In a small overcrowded space, we did warm-up’s, exercise games and exercises, in small groups.

During the weekend, I was tidying up my room and borrowing through my cupboard when I came across my old diary. Then, I sensed a feeling in my body to open it. Inside, I found a sheet of paper with cards written to me from the person the boy who I mentioned in my first entry. I didn’t look and read them because I knew it would make me sad. But I didn’t want to think about it so I decided to move on – properly.

I tore up and shredded all the cards. It wasn’t a decision I wanted to make but I knew, deep down that I had to do it.

Then on the third week (until the beginning of November), my lessons turned out to be like this:

Monday

Thursday

Friday

10:00

Practical Session Year 1

10:30
11:00

Practical Session Year 1 *

11:30
12:00

Break

12:30

Vocal

Support Time

Module 101 & 102

13:00
13:30

Lunch

14:00

Break

14:30

Module 101 & 102

Module 101 & 102

Home

15:00
15:30
16:00

Dinner

16:30

Home

17:00

Christmas Show Rehearsal

17:30
18:00
18:30

Home

* Not on 13/9

I also had extra rehearsals between 7 to 8.30pm on 21st October and 4th November.

During the third week, I’ve been re-reading my old diary entries. Sometimes, I forget that I started this task six months ago. I’ve also learned about myself. Some things are good and some are bad. Then, I discovered a sheet of paper. This piece of paper was written in small sentences under my name, as a title. This paper, I think was written while I was in the Brownies or Girl Guides:

Georgiana

* Your funny and kind.

Enthusiastic and Intelligent.

Fun and lively and always happy x .

Always smiling, can be very

funny, whilst not knowing.

Very friendly and approachable as a

student.

Very smiley and happy and always lively.

She is very funny when sings and has a good voice.

She is kind, friendly, and always happy

Georgiana is funny special and absolutely quiet girl keep smiling

Georgiana and also keep singing because you never know you

might even get brought to this year’s the X Factor.

Georgiana is nice and friendly.

Reading it (after many years) made want to smile. Looking at what the girls, who I used to know, wrote made me realise that I nearly forget the real me. I have a lot of enthusiasm but worry and anxiety over the last year had taken over my system. But people always say that I always smile and I am very cheery; I try to camouflage my true feelings. Guess, it seems to be working.

I’m starting to realise that it’s okay to be funny without knowing, kind, enthusiastic, friendly and approachable to everyone when I need to. If people are being nasty, I could say nothing or just tell them (calmly and polity) not to do things to me.

Then, I decided to change completely by setting myself a new list:

The Do’s and Don’t’s of a Young Adult Life

  1. DO set boundaries for yourself
  1. DO keep your true friends by your side and help them in every way they can
  1. DON’T let people who dislike you bring you down
  1. DON’T get stressed with everything that goes wrong in your life
  1. DO keep on believing – if you work hard and keep on dreaming, they may one day come true
  1. DO carry on the things that you love to do, i.e., your favourite hobbies
  1. DON’T ignore or shy away from immature people, unless you have nothing to say
  1. DON’T create a drama scene – your actions might ruin your image
  1. DO think about others more than yourself
  1. DON’T act like a drama queen, focusing on problems which are not your own.

After writing it down, I hope I would follow these rules. Now, I begin to think on positive thoughts; it was the only way to do this and I always said to myself, “I mustn’t let myself down”.

I need to start to see the real me. Hopefully, I will be able to achieve this; if not, then I can always start again until I can get it right – it’s just like rehearsing a dance routine.

Waiting For A Rainbow – 1st September 2014 – Part IV

On the twentieth, I slowly woke up in my bed when Dad walked in with a letter in his hand; it was for me. When he handed the letter and left me, I slowly got up and opened the envelope. Inside, there were a couple of pieces of paper, all from Drama school; one of them was my BTEC results. I read the piece of paper again and again and I couldn’t believe my eyes.

I screamed for joy and rushed to Mum and Dad. Dad was walking up the stairs, when he heard my cry and Mum was coming out of the bathroom. I told them my results and we all cuddled each other.

My final grades I received were A* A* A. It was a shock to me; I didn’t expect my final grades to be like this. I thanked God for guiding and supporting me through my BTEC and have asked him to help me through the Foundation Degree; I’m sure he will.

I’ve also received a letter conforming my rehearsal timetable for the Christmas show and a timetable for the Autumn Term.

Later that day, Mum and I picked A from work in the town centre and drove her back to her house where she dropped us off.

J was already in the house when A and I came in. While A was getting ready, I talked to J although he was playing a football game on his Xbox.

J was playing in a football match in Berkhamstead, so A and I dropped him off before we walked into the High Street, to find somewhere to eat dinner. Everywhere we looked, the restaurants were expensive. In the end, A and I went the local fish n’ chip shop.

Then, A and I were planning to go down to a pub and have a drink but I forget my ID. So, we went down to Waitrose and bought bottled drinks. Then, we walked along the canal and sat on the nearest bench where we had a little girl talk. When we got too cold, we walked back to the car park and watched YouTube videos of celebrities doing the Ice Bucket Challenge and Tina Fey and Amy Poehler, hosting the Golden Globes on A’s phone.

A and I went out again on the twenty-fourth. We returned to London; this time, we went to see Shakespeare’s Globe.

We went around on the tour around the theatre, the exhibition and watched a half-an-hour session of sword fighting, played by professionals. It was interesting to watch; I absolutely loved it.

After lunch at Nando’s, we walked along the River Thames; we went passed City Hall, crossed Tower Bridge and stopped for a while at the Tower of London. Inside the mount, there were artificial poppies. These were erected to remember the men who died in the First World War. A wonderful tribute, I thought. We took pictures and looked at them before moving on. We continued to walk on; back to the Millennium Bridge.

That evening, U came to stay at my house for another sleepover. We slept in my room; she and I watched the film Mamma Mia and had a sing along before we went to sleep.

The next morning, we had breakfast and went into town.

When we returned, Mum made us lunch.

It was wonderful having U around for a sleepover. U is like a little younger sister to me while A is like an older sister. We hope to have another one soon.

At the end of August, H, G, my brother and sister-in-law went to Willows Farm for the day. We had a blast.

H played on the outdoor playground sites, rode on a tractor ride with his parents, squirted water in a water pistol game, dug for gold in a gold mine, feed and touched the animals. However the highlight of the day for H was trying the zip-wire for the first time. On his first go, H had help from his dad while my sister-in-law, Mum, Dad, G and I watched from a bench nearby. When he had his next go, H took off by himself without my brother assisting him; the rest of the family watched in anxiety as we happily waved to H. H lifted one of his arms to wave back at us, but he lost his consecration; H nearly lost his balance and fell off (the rope touched the tire up above). It was a breathless moment; we couldn’t breathe and wondered what would happen next. Luckily, H regained his consecration and placed his hand back onto the rope, just in time before the rope before slid back to the middle where H could get off. Afterwards, H was happy as Larry and we couldn’t have been more proud of him.

For the rest of the day, Mum, Dad and I took turns and had one-to-one sessions with H.

We also spent time with G, especially Mum and me. I got to push G’s buggy most of the day to give my sister-in-law a break. It’s funny that I have taking an interest to this but Mum thinks that I’m getting older and have taken interest in helping out.

“It’s a treat for Georgina”, Mum said to my brother when I was pushing the buggy.

Then, I noticed (especially in the corn maze) how bumpy the pavements were; this made it difficult for me to push the buggy. My brother then explained to me that G likes the buggy bumping along rocky pavements; it’s like a comfort zone for him.

After spending the day at Willows, we drove back to my brother’s house; H decided to travel with us. He feel asleep during the journey.

We stayed for a few minutes before we went home.

On the last day of August, A and I spent the afternoon at Althorp. We looked around the gardens, the exhibitions (inside the stables) and had a tour around the house.

The estate is very beautiful; the lands are so green and the gardens were paradise. But the highlight of the visit was the special monument the Spencer Family built for Diana, the late Princess of Wales. All around the monument, I saw that there were loads of flowers.

When no one was looking, I had a quiet reflection. Princess Diana, I said in deep thought, I want to thank you for being my inspiration.

Princess Diana is an inspiration to me because she was very charitable and loving to everyone.

I first came a cross Princess Diana when I was in Secondary School; in a Drama lesson, my teacher asked gave my peers and myself homework to find and bring back research one person who inspires us.

I wanted to find a special someone who inspires but I couldn’t find anyone. In the end, I ended up with Princess Diana. I explained to my class that she inspires me because she had a very kind heart with all the charitable work she had done and given to the world. From all the work she had done, I wanted to grow up and help everyone just like her.

Now in my early adulthood, I admire her more and more.

September is an exciting month for me especially I’ll be starting a new year at Drama school and on a new course too. I wonder what the new students will be like and who will come back. I guess I’ll have to wait and see….

Waiting For A Rainbow – 1st September 2014 – Part III

The next class I attended with Mum was Introduction to Mediumship.

In my first session, we were joined by ten individuals inside a small marquee tent in the school fields. The teacher, M R started the class; she gave an introduction about the class and led us with an opening mediation prayer. Then, M put the group into pairs or threes and instructed us to close our eyes; listen, see or feel anything while mediating. If we do, we had to write down information about the spirit we were contacting. We had five minutes to complete this task. Then, we had to share our experiences.

Then, M R swapped partners around and asked the class to take out an object that belongs to us or used to belong to someone else (we know or knew).  However, M R would change the second task. In two out of the four classes I attended, M R would put the class into pairs and instruct them to write ten things about ourselves, including names of our friends, names of places, etc. Then, each pair has to visualise each other using their energy source and write down what they have seen, heard or felt while mediating. When we were finished, everyone had to share what they wrote down to see if they were correct or not.

I was struggling by the second session. But there was help; I was talking with C before we started one of the Improv Comedy sessions. While were talking, I brought the situation. C suggested that I should listen to the spirits when I ask them questions and play tricks on them I can communicate with them. I took on her advice and when I tried it worked – very well. I couldn’t have been more pleased with myself.

On our first night, Mum and I had a chillax in the Main Marquee (which is also in the school fields); I met M, X and JJ there because we were about to put on an Adult Comedy Show. There were other who joined us too – U and Y. Together, we were the Saucy Bikers. During the show, the Saucer Bikers would perform activates and stand-up comedy we’ve done in the Improvisation Comedy lessons.

We played many games and some of them, we were trying involve the audience in the Marquee. We only played for two nights but we gave them our best shot.

I was involved in a lot of games, including A Day in the Life and the Interview Game.

We also did Musical Improvisation Comedy. I had never this before; to be honest, I wasn’t sure about doing this. However, M insisted we should all join in. With an offer like that, I couldn’t say “no”.

The audience had to suggest three words that the Saucy Bikers had to use in our lyrics. Then, M told us what we had to sing and what form, whither it was a verse, the chorus, Gospel, Rap or Opera.

In one song, the words we received were “Tapirs”, “Drinking” and “Coffee”; the song was then called, “Why Tapirs Love Drinking Coffee”. Then, U who organised the Musical Comedy section in the show came up to each individual in the Saucy Bikers and told us what parts and forms we had to sing. Most people were given verses or chorus. However, U suggested I should do Opera, while L had to rap. L was panicking; she was looking at me because she didn’t know what to do. Politely and with a friendly smile, I suggested that we should go for it. This turned out well – the audience were laughing along with us.

At the end of our last show, the Saucy Bikers congratulated themselves and high-fived with each other before we left to join the rest of the evening’s festivities.

I went to find Mum, who was still in the Marquee and sitting on a couch (there were loads of couches for everyone to sit down). But, she wasn’t alone; sitting next to her was a young woman. I sat next to them and we began to talk. Unfortunately, we didn’t catch her name. She told us that she came from a small part of Europe called the La petite Sibérie (Little Siberia). This is between France and Switzerland; but it is very cold over there and the snow falls heavily in the winter.

Next evening, Mum took me to the Angelic Harmony Therapy class. She went there before I started the Comedy show. She confessed that she had felt a sensation within her, telling her that she should take me with her to the next session.

The teacher who ran the class welcomed individuals into the class with open arms.

When the class began, she (the teacher) showed the group how to commit to the therapy classes. First, we had to create a circle. Then, three people had to volunteer to sit in the middle of the circle and sit on the chairs; this depends what healing process they want from the angels, i.e. Raphael for courage (which was the one I had) or Samuel for self-love. Altogether, the rest of the group will heal the people, singing the names of their chosen angels. While singing, the group lead by the teacher created a powerful vibe in the tent. When the vibe was strong enough, we created a bubble, using our energy resources to heal them; if individuals within the group want to, they could heal themselves by placing the energy around their bodies and charka’s.

Feeling the vibe around me, my hands and realising how powerful it was, my mind was blown away. At the end of the session, a few people were crying and hugging.

When we left the session and were walking back to Lockyers, Mum was smiling; I was speechless. It took me some time before I started talking again; when I did, all I ever talked about was how inspiring the class was. The Therapy class has helped me to see healing in a different way; I hope this experience will help me towards the next stages of my life, walking into new directions and waiting for new opportunities to arise.

On Day Four, I attended the Zendoodle and Zentangle Art Class. Zendoodle and Zentangle Art is a mediation session were everyone in the class would draw, colour or paint using patterns.

In my mind, I thought about drawing a circle. It wasn’t until the end of the class that I drew a Chinese ying and yang circle, with bright colours of a peacock and dark colours of a tiger.

Later in the afternoon, I attended the Law of Attraction class.

The class was very interesting; at first, I thought the Law of Attraction was about how to make someone fall in love with you. Then, I realised that the class was about allowing yourself to feel emotions from bad experiences you have suffered. All we had to do was to take the emotions away and replace them with happy memories, positive feelings, and set dreams and targets, using special breathing techniques.

Yoga Body Jazz is a mixed variety of dancing and yoga. The session allowed our bodies to be carefree while dancing to upbeat music (mostly Santana); this is a good way to warm ourselves up, just as long as we don’t hurt ourselves. To do that, we warm different parts of the body; one-by-one. This was followed by a yoga and a meditating session, not long afterwards.

When the session was finished, Mum and I were packing away our yoga mats when R came over to talk to us. We catched up on the latest news and what we were doing now; I was really excited when I told R that I was starting the Foundation Degree Course.

I don’t know what happened next, if I told her that I wanted to be actress or if she asked before I told her but R told me an inspirational story about a person she knew. This person spent her free time playing in a band. The person was going through a difficult phase as she was working too. She was struggling but R managed to support and guide this person. In the end, she made a choice to keep her job and stay with her band. Now, she plays once a month and is very happy.

“Don’t give up”, R said when she finished telling me the story, “Keep believing in your dreams”.

On my last day, I decided (for a change) to not go to Improv Comedy and try Water Aerobics. I hope that M doesn’t mind, I thought.

It was a beautiful and sunny afternoon; before I started the session, I sat down on the grass, next to the outdoor pool and read my book, “Jane”. There were no changing rooms nearby and the pool (I could see when I was standing up) had solar panels next to the edge.

A few minutes later, I was still waiting for the teacher to come and start the lesson. When I stood up, I noticed a male lifeguard coming towards me. I asked him if the Aerobics class was on and he said it was on; he pointed out to a lady who talked to me who was the teacher.

The Water Aerobics session was interesting. For an hour, a man, a woman and I did regular exercises in the pool like running or jogging. I never thought that doing these exercises was going to be hard, especially running and going under the water with floats. I also had fun with the floats – every time I want to do an exercise with them, the knots would untie themselves and I threw back onto the side of the pool. Although I had some difficulty, I had lots of fun doing the Aerobics.

In the Main Marquee (in the evening), there were varieties of entertainment for the whole family. This includes the Improv Comedy and a talent show.

One night, there was a fire show outside the Main Marquee, introducing a few volunteers and children (all of them were boys between the ages of eight and twelve years). There were lit up hula-hoop displays too. The crowd went wild for them and the kids were having a wonderful time; they were absolute professionals.

On the last night, there was a final show; everyone came together to perform and show what we’ve done at the festival. There was a pixie-fairy show, starring the children, an Impro Musical Comedy show by the adults, Improv Comedy from the kids, and teens; a twisted show of Robert Louis Stevenson’s Treasure Island and a performance of Michael Jackson’s Thriller by an amazing team of dancers.

I also took part with the Singing for All choir and performed three songs.

Unfortunately in the middle of the show, it started to rain. Not long after, the Marquee was overcrowded; there wasn’t much room and it was very noisy. It didn’t help for those were doing the show as some members were talking over the performances while they were running.

At the end of the show, there was a live DJ who came in and played music. Everyone boogied down until the night is out; myself being one of them, but I didn’t stay up too late.

Our meal times were interesting and adventurous; Mum and I met many different people and I learned so much about their hobbies and cultures. Some were from the UK and across the globe. We would talk while eating our meals at the same time.

One lunchtime, regular sounds of talking and children playing were interpreted by an all singing and dancing conga line, full of people. All of them were from the Improv Comedy class including R, M and X. I realised that they were celebrating a birthday – A’s; A was one of the peers from the Improv class. The line started inside the dining room. Then, everyone danced around the cafeteria garden. In the middle of the conga, I asked Mum if I can join in.

“If you want”, she answered plainly.

I quickly joined to the back of the line, happily singing:

Birthday conga,

Birthday conga,

Birthday conga;

Happy Birthday A,

Happy Birthday A.

Then, A’s cake was brought out and the group sang “Happy Birthday” before I returned to Mum and ate my lunch.

On our last day, Mum and I left after brunch. We said our goodbyes to our friends and drove for fifteen miles.

We spent the afternoon in Glastonbury. We first went to Clark’s Village. We did some shopping and bought lunch from Pert a Manager. Then, we drove and walked into the town centre; we passed the ruins of Glastonbury Abbey, sadly destroyed during the Dissolution of the Monasteries. We stopped in a car park nearby and hopped on a small mini-bus which took us and a few passengers up the hill to the Tor. The Tor is set on a hill and the tower is a grade one listed building. There have been many legends that St Patrick had visited and King Arthur is buried there with his Queen Consort, Guinevere. Mum and I climbed up a steep hill before we reached the tower; we didn’t stay long though as it was very windy. We found a short cut and walked down to the outskirts of the town centre and made another stop to The Chalice Well and Gardens.

The Chalice and Gardens is a holy place where spiritualists come to heal themselves and have a reflection of prayer. The gardens were beautiful; all round, there was nothing but nature at its finest. There is no noise coming from outside – just the sound of the wind gently blowing in the breeze. We also saw butterflies fluttering in the sun. Most of the time, Mum and I sat on the benches, enjoying the stillness of the gardens. I took a dip in the healing pool in King Arthur’s Court, while holding on the stone stair-rail behind me. With my black wellingtons on my feet, I could feel the energy source from the water but it wasn’t cold. Mum and I also drunk some pure spring water (using our palms). It was a real struggle because the water kept pouring out but we managed after a while. It was cool and refreshing. Then, we sat down in the Angel Seat, which was covered by an arched hedge with ornaments tied on top of it; there were hairbands, crucifix beads and multi-coloured bracelets. I was amazed and touched by them. I couldn’t stop looking at them. Mum told me that people leave ornaments to make wishes. I didn’t have anything to tie up so I gently held a leaf on my finger tips and made a wish for myself. Finally, we walked up to the sanctuary, where there was a small altar with a statue of Mary and baby Jesus opposite Well Head. Below the statue, there were small candles, but five of them weren’t lit. I found one candle and lit it against another. When the flame was there, I placed it in front of the statue. Unfortunately, the wind blew it out and I had to repeat the same process again. As I was about to place the candle in its original place, Mum found a space in the shadow part of the altar, on the left-hand side.

“Why don’t you put it there?” she suggested.

And that’s what I did.

The gardens were paradise and we didn’t want to leave but we knew we had too.

After we visited the gardens, walked back into Glastonbury town and ate our lunch before setting off home; we arrived in the early evening.

Throughout the holiday, I decided to go without technology for 168 hours. However, I love my technology so much; I couldn’t live without it.

 

To be continued…

Waiting For A Rainbow – 1st September 2014 – Part II

On the twelfth of August the twelfth, Mum and I went on holiday to the OneWorld Festival. We were there until the eighteenth. OneWorld is a spiritual festival, which travels around the UK and aboard every year. This year, the festival was in Somerset. We’ve been to the festival before but this was the first time we’ve been for two years; I choose not to go last year because of my studies.

Because they travel a lot, the festival accommodates their visitors in boarding secondary schools in the UK; visitors are given a choice. They can either camp or hire a dormitory room.

This year, we stayed at the Brymore Academy School for Boys. Brymore is a farming school and is set in the beautiful Somerset countryside between the villages of Minehead and Cannington. The school also has a farm and it is used by students for them to learn farming skills which is part of their lessons.

Mum and I stayed outside the school grounds, near the farm. Our accommodation was a newly built bungalow, called Lockyers. We were lucky; we were one of the first people to use it. Later, it’ll be used as a holiday rent cottage. Inside, there was a large kitchen, a living room, a bathroom and three bedrooms along the corridor. Mum and I slept in one of the master bedrooms or “the middle bedroom” as I like to call it. We shared Lockyers with a woman in her late forties and her teenage son in one room and a middle-aged couple in the other.

Inside our room, there were cream and white walls, a king-sized double bed, wardrobe, Chester drawers and French doors, leading out to the car park. Outside, there is more farmland and a road leading to the school grounds.

Later in the afternoon, staff and visitors came together in the main field and formed a giant circle to open the annual 19th OneWorld Festival. To declare the festival open, everyone had to join hands and pass on an electric energy to the person next to them. The opening ceremony turned out to be a comical one; the energy was taking it’s time when suddenly, someone had an idea; the idea was squeezing hands to make the energy go faster. Then out of the blue, the squeezing hands turned into a Mexican wave. We laughed all the way to the end and clapped when we finished.

Then, we had two small sessions. First was Qi Gong, followed by a mediation prayer, which involved body movement, and thanking Mother Earth for giving us life, nourishment, and feeding everything around the earth.

Unfortunately, Mum and I couldn’t see anything expect for a couple of stars. It was too cloudy and the lights from Lockyers were switched on. I was disappointed that I didn’t get a chance to see the shower but there will be more of them in the future.

During our five days, we attended lessons that were going on around the school. Before we went on holiday, I drew up a timetable so I can remember the classes I have attended:

Wednesday 13th

Thursday 14th Friday 15th Saturday 16th Sunday 17th

06.30

  07.00

       07.30

  08.00

08.30

Breakfast Breakfast Breakfast Breakfast

Breakfast

  09.00

09.30

The Real Me (Room 5) The Real Me (Room 5) Zendoodle Art – Zentangles & Zendalas (Art Room 1) Yoga Body Jazz (Main Marquee)

Yoga Body Jazz (Main Marquee)

10.00

10.30

11.00

Break Break Break Break

Break

11.30

Free Period Singing For All (Sports Hall) Singing For All (Sports Hall) Singing For All (Sports Hall)

Singing For All (Sports Hall)

12.00

12.30

13.00

Lunch Lunch Lunch Lunch

Lunch

  13.30

14.00

14.30

Improvisation Comedy (Main Common Room) Improvisation Comedy (Main Common Room) Improvisation Comedy (Main Common Room)

Improvisation Comedy (Main Common Room)

  15.00

Aqua Fit or Water Aerobics (Swimming Pool)

15.30

16.00

16.30

Introduction to Mediumship (The Bee Hive) Introduction to Mediumship (The Bee Hive) Law of Attraction… Simples (Room 5) Introduction to Mediumship (The Bee Hive)

Introduction to Mediumship (The Bee Hive)

17.00

17.30

18.00

Dinner Dinner Dinner Dinner

Dinner

18.30

19.00

19.30

Free Period

Angelic Harmony Therapy (The Yurt) Free Period Free Period

OneWorld Final Show (Main Marquee)

20.00

20.30

Free Period

21.00

21.30

22.00

22.30

23.00

23.30

The first class Mum and I went to was “The Real Me”. In this class, the aim is to support everyone and help them to discover their true identity and their true purposes.

In the class, we bumped into old friends, M who teaches Improvisation Comedy and X. They just arrived in the classroom and then, we recognised each other. We talked before our teacher, JJ started the lecture. To start, JJ asked the group to talk about ourselves and share an object that represents us. We had all sorts of objects; from M with her phone and photographs, representing her interest in street photography, Mum with her dog walking bag to me with my journal, explaining my love for creative writing. But there was one story that really interested me. One lady, C (who sat next to me in the class) brought in a broken hair clip, filled with multi-coloured flowers. C in tears, explained to the group what the flowers on the clip meant to her, partially the purple one which was snapped in two. C’s clip touched me; in my mind, I imagined the flowers represented C’s life and her emotions. My heart goes out to her for being really brave sharing the clip with everyone.

 

Then, JJ gave out spreadsheets to the group; the spreadsheet had a drawing of a mansion house, with two bold lines, separating the ground floor, top floor and the roof. For the next two sessions, we had to focus on the “ground” (or “foundation”) and the “aspiration” levels. We filled in the boxes before reaching the lines and the roof; we focused on:

  1. Support – Who/What Can I Rely for Unconditional Support?
  1. Values – What Core Principles Do I Have That I’m Not Prepared to Compromise?
  1. Strengths – What Strengths Do I Have?
  1. Inspiration – Who Do I Truly Admire and Why?
  1. Vision – How Would I Like My Future to Be?
  1. Attributes – How Would I Like Myself and Others to Describe Me?

In both workshops, JJ gave us a few minutes to fill in each section before we shared our thoughts within the group. Unfortunately, I can’t remember what everyone else in the group or what Mum had said for her sections.

Attributes:

 

  • Outgoing
  • Bubbly
  • Care free
  • Happy
  • Helpful
  • Hard-working
  • Dreamer/Believer
  • Fair
  • Open-minded
  • Curious
  • Positive
  • Adventurous
  • Calm
  • Brave
  • Friendly
  • Non-judgemental

Vision:

 

  • Seeking or finding love
  • Being spiritual
  • To go on adventures, i.e. travel and learn different cultures
  • Be courageous; to take the next step in my life
  • To achieve what I want in need in my life and work
  • To inspire others
  • To change lives
  • To trust myself
  • To reach my goals
  • To be stronger

Inspiration:

 

  • My friends and teachers because their disability doesn’t stop them
  • Jacqueline Wilson who has inspired me to write children’s stories
  • Those who I believe in
  • Kate Winslet because of my interest in acting
  • Kerry Ellis; her work has interested me so much that I want to become an actress, a star or take part in a musical, just like her
  • Children – who I work with and who are in my family

 

Strengths:

 

  • Creativity
  • Curiosity
  • Love of learning
  • Courageous
  • Forgiveness

 

Values:

 

  • To take or be in charge in group projects
  • To not help a person in need when they’re nasty
  • To allow myself independence in the near future
  • To allow myself what I’m truly feeling (e.g. emotions inside of me)

 

Support:

 

  • My parents
  • My Auntie
  • My Cousin (Carer)
  • Teachers at Drama school
  • My friends who can I trust and rely – but not all of them.

After we completed the boxes, we worked on the roof:

ACTION – WHERE AM I NOW?

JJ suggested that we should re-read the sections, think and write down what we should stop, continue and start doing. On my roof, I wrote:

STOP     CONTINUE          START

 

  • Being judgemental
  • Holding back
  • Not listening to myself
  • To not help nasty people
  • Rushing things
  • Being by myself so much
  • Being positive
  • Being happy
  • Being creative
  • Dreaming, achieving and believing
  • Working hard on my studies
  • Exploring the things I want to do
  • Write/publish children’s stories
  • Getting involved in teamwork
  • Read more books
  • Getting out of my comfort zone

When we finished our spreadsheets on the second day, JJ lead us into a closing circle and we said our final goodbyes while mediating and listening to the song, “Happy New Year”. Although it was too early to celebrate the New Year, the song represented the next chapter of our lives, trying to change and making them better.

On the first day, I decided to go to the Singing for All class after “The Real Me”. However, M said that the teacher L was ill and has decided to cancel the first session. So, I decided to the Creative Writing Therapy class with Mum but it was cancelled too! In the end, we decided to walk into Cannington Village and had an early lunch.

The next day, L was feeling better. I went to the singing class; Mum decided to come along too.

In L sessions, we sang all kinds of songs, mostly from different cultures. There were some everyone (expect for new people, including Mum and I) knew. Together, we learned all of them; within half an hour, we would know them off by heart. On our first session, we rehearsed a song about honouring our grandparents, made noises of the Rainforest using our voices, and bodies (chanted some Swahili or was is Zulu?), all the way from Africa and learned two songs in English, “Swinging Down Charity” and “Let It Go”, which were written by L herself.  The next day, we learned how to sing “Happy Birthday” in Welsh. It was M’s birthday; she recently went there on holiday so L led the group to sing these words to M:

Pen-blwydd Hapus i chi, Penblwydd Hapus i chi.

Pen-blwydd Hapus annwyl Maureen.

Pen-blwydd Hapus i chi.

The next session I went too, was Improvisation Comedy, M’s class. This time, I went on my own. X and JJ were there. I also bumped into another familiar face, R G.

R is a yoga teacher and works with children who have special needs.

When M starts her classes, she leads the entire group to a few warm-ups including sway-dancing to “Mambo Number 5”, walking, and pointing to objects around the Main Common Room and create an imaginary story out of it.

We also played games – “Red Ball, Blue Ball and Jelly”, News Interviews, the list goes on.

To be continued….